Panties & Porkchops: Let’s Talk About Sexting

Panties & Porkchops follows the life of Keri Lathan, a chick who doesn’t mind documenting her obsession with sexual taboos and the midnight snacking that ensues.

I may be the only person that you’ll ever meet that scurries away from voice calls. I don’t like the song and dance of saying “Hello”, acknowledging the caller, ascertaining the purpose of the call, and then the drawn out process of saying goodbye. It’s too much. That’s why I adhere to a strict TEXT only policy. Email is fine, but I have this thing about being too “Watergate-esque” with the paper trail and all. I know, texts are the same thing but they just don’t seem as official.

I especially love sexting. I mean, it’s much easier for me to tell you that I rubbed one out during my lunchbreak via text than actually calling you to tell you that. I mean, how awkward is that conversation going to be? The only thing that bothers me about sexting is the end of the “conversation”.

I have been messing around with this guy for about a month now, and by “messing around” I mean that we just talk dirty to each other via SMS. I hate to toot my own horn, but I’m pretty excellent at it! I would purposefully text him when I know he’s with other people so that I can feel somewhat superior with my constant teasing. What I don’t like about this guy is that after we’re all done, he just stops talking to me. No goodbye,  no “Well that was nice.” Not even a “Okay, well I gotta’ take off.”

I guess what I’m trying to say is, he makes me feel cheap. I feel like I’m back in high school again, when my boyfriend would leave me alone in my room after convincing me that every girl was doing it, and yes, we will be together forever. Uh huh, sure. So what should I do? Should I just stop talking to this guy or take it for what it is, a “sextual” relationship that isn’t based on anything concrete? What’s a gal to do?